teeny tiny terrors (should grow the hell up)

So recently I've been going up to main school to talk to some of the teachers there (various endeavours require student-teacher conversations, it's unfortunate). Anyway, I've heard tiny tiny children (the year sevens, they'd be cute if they weren't so vicious and rude) yelling all manner of insults at each other. What is this? Why do young people not know how to argue properly any more? It's truly ridiculous, nobody ever seems to sit down and calmly talk through anything, instead it's all yelling and throwinf various things- insults, punches, chairs, and so on.

This miniscule scrap of a kid the other day yelled the words "Oi, get off me bruv, you gayboy!" I fail to see why being gay is a bad thing, something to be used as an insult, and as for all this "bruv" business, you merely sound like you can't pronounce the word broth properly. Year sevens, in short, are idiots. Anybody who can run into me at top speed (not that fast, they only have short legs, remember) and bounce off my chiseled abs (ha!) without so much as a sorry... Deserves to be shot. In the kneecaps. Hopefully with some sort of gun that sports exploding bullets, or something.

So yes, a note to the year sevens: Go away. You are deceptively small, fast, and apart from being completely cuturally unaware ("What you doing man?! That's so gay! Oi battyboy! Fuck you!"), you are ruining our precious language. You are also required to not get in the goddamn way. I have to say please more than twice and your name goes in the black book, you little bastards. I don't care that your mummy thinks you're special. Learn something. Read a book, "y'all". If you can't read, then it's no problem, not for me anyway, because then you can't read my insults. Har har har. LEARN TO READ. Learn some respect. Then, keep to yourselves. Wow.

happy reading folks!