I've changed again.

When I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror (typical vanity, but there's honesty in it), I could barely see because my eyes were all puffed up. I looked like someone had broken my nose and magically hidden the bruising colour that goes with the panda eyes. I cry in my sleep sometimes and it's just a case of working out how to get on with life even when things get me down. The only thing that stops me just falling into that well of unhappiness is a man. He's very important. I said this to my mother the day I met him.

His name is Mikolaj. And this man, this fantastic person with such a vibrant and funny personality (although sometimes he puts himself down and it's silly) seems to have walked into my life out of nowhere. And I have fallen in love.
He was just talking to someone else... And it was one of those awesome moments where I realised that even though I'd never seen or spoken to him before he was going to be one of those incredibly rare and almost frustratingly interesting people. And ever since he turned round about ten seconds after I first noticed him... We got talking and he is the most important, amazing, wonderful, grumpy person in my life. I actually love his grumpiness (he doesn't realise but when he's pouting slightly and his eyebrows are all angular he looks gorgeous. Still.)
Anyway, telling my mother about it was the easiest thing ever and I am happy mainly because EVERYONE accepted us right away. Not that I'd have cared. But the point I'm trying to make here is,

Mikolaj. You are possibly the most insane and grumpy and weird and crazy person I have ever met. And you make me lose sleep and I miss you and sometimes GAWD is your ability to eat Truffles annoying (my bank account! My poor bank account!) but I love you. You make me happier than anybody else ever has and I will be thankful for that forever. Kochanie, you rock my socks and you are the insane light that leads me (and I'm sure static shocks me into slight sanity every now and then, when it's needed).
Thankyou for being wonderful and yourself and speaking Polish when you're tired and drinking ridiculous amounts of  coffee and making me laugh until it hurts. Thankyou for the hats with ears and the halloween visit and the Christmas of awesomeness (even though you weren't here). Thankyou for the new Year, it was the vest start to 2011 I could have hoped for. I love you. Thank you for everything. You're incredible.