A different kind of challenge (a.k.a why I am poor and happy)

Hi again,

I realised it's been a while again (nothing near as long as the last "while", but still) and thought I'd update you a little bit as to what's happening, what's not happening (ahem, SURGERY, so far, still a long way off), and my mindset.

Last time I wrote, I was pretty much whining about this and that but explaining it's not the end of the world for me. I've been brought up never to assume, so for me to turn around and tell you I expect bright things around the corner would be, well, bullshit. I don't expect anything to make its way to me - I'm going out and finding it instead.

New place/living space
Firstly, I found and moved into somewhere new, because my old tenancy ended and I needed to stay in this city to work. To say it was difficult to find a place is both truth and lies ( a half-truth, I suppose), because I really limited myself for a long time by saying I wouldn't rent any place more than £425, and with the amount of storage space I need (it's not my stuff, I'm holding it for someone!!), that wasn't going to cut it.

Essentially what ended up happening was that I moved home for a week, but still commuted to work and to view the new place. This took six hours out of my day and was incredibly tiring, not to mention expensive, so you can imagine a week was MORE than enough time for me to appreciate living away from my original home!

New quietness
I was actually living with someone before, and that someone is now thousands of miles away, so things are much quieter and I find myself spending a lot more time out of the house. I'm particularly getting back into exercising, though in all honesty my back still isn't great so I'm a bit limited at the moment.

I'm having to really push it at work to get the hours I need to pay rent, and though the job isn't hell, it can be unnecessarily stressful, so to come back to an empty room isn't always pleasant when I really want to just whine. In a way though, it's a different and quite humbling experience to be completely on my own for the first time.

I have to budget very carefully for food and be careful with myself so I can keep going to work and pay for the things I need. Work actually allows me one "break" per shift, and provides a little food and drink in that time, but I'm learning to save it for the end of the shift. Today I spent ten minutes appreciating an Americano. It might sound a bit silly until you know that that came after eight miles of cycling deliveries in the rain.

Yesterday was the turning point when I realised I had to be careful. I was eating my 'saved' break and running for the bus, and I threw the last quarter away to run better (genuinely, sprinting), but the bus wouldn't stop, so I missed it - and then all I could think about was the food I'd just thrown away and how I couldn't afford more for the day, and it was a horrible moment.

Today I spent about an hour at the end of my shift with a coffee and a sandwich because honestly, having that makes me so happy! I also had a few strawberries in the fridge at home and a couple weren't ripe, so I left them on my windowsill in the sun to ripen and had them when I came home today.

"I never needed a lot of the things I thought were necessary"

And I've realised this is all I need to be happy now, and it's an odd kind of bliss, but being careful and really appreciating my time and my food is helping me. I'm trying to spend as little money as possible and it's teaching me that I never needed a lot of the things I thought were necessary. I've re-read old books and re-watched old films in the last couple of days and now I'm in a more relaxed state of mind and I can focus on reaching little goals rather than trying to overreach.

Happy Reading, folks!

I took six months away from blogging and my life changed completely.

Hi peeps!

Hope you're all good and well and enjoying your various lives. I've been thinking about blogging again for a little while and thought that, actually, given people are wondering what's going on, I'd do well to explain myself after such an impromptu absence.

Illness

Firstly, I've been ill pretty much since my last post and it's been getting me down, and I didn't want to share that with anyone for a while. Back in September/November, I was very stressed at uni, taking eighteen hour days or longer and not getting enough sleep. I started falling asleep in class and never being able to concentrate, and eventually I got kind of weirdly weak and was having trouble walking or doing anything, really, so I missed some lectures (and I fell asleep in all lectures I went to). I went to the doctor and they said I might be anaemic, but I really wasn't feeling up to a blood test (I know it sounds stupid, but I felt weak and terrible already and I didn't want one), so I started eating a little more, particularly meat, and felt better. My flatmates were all really lovely and supportive through that time and helped me feel a lot better as well.

I had a 'blip' in November when I ended up in hospital from the stress I'd put myself under, and started realising that getting better physically (and mentally) and grappling with uni work were not synonymous, simultaneous or reasonable as a personal goal.

By December, I'd lost a lot of weight and I just felt ready to give up, plus I just couldn't stay up and out of bed enough to do work although I was a lot better than my November self. Going home for Christmas and still having tons of work to do was soul-destroying, there was a lot I hadn't done from first semester and I still had a lot of coursework I had to get in for right after the holidays, so I half-heartedly managed it, but I didn't do a good job and just working was very depressing. I sort of began drinking more, not hard since I barely drank before, but I didn't like how that was going so I pulled myself out of it.

After Christmas

Coming back to uni in January felt forced and I was having trouble walking or sitting again, but it wasn't anything to do with diet. I kept getting back pains, something I've had for years but never really paid attention to before. Anyway, it got so bad I couldn't sleep, let alone get up in the morning or walk, and I stopped going to lectures and spoke to my academic advisor about it, as well as doctors and my parents.

I got a chest infection that wouldn't shift and was ordered home for a week, where I wasn't allowed to leave the house and my mum pretty much forced bedrest on me. After two days the pain in my back was unbearable and coming back to Oxford, I felt different; my priorities changed.

I stopped going to university. I stopped studying. I took five or six weeks to sit around, do the things I wanted and see more doctors, all of whom looked at my back and said the same thing: you have scoliosis. It's treatable. Here are some painkillers (I hate painkillers). I am officially no longer a student.

Changes (am... Am I a real adult now?)

I got a full-time job, because my parents (who have very generously been paying for my accommodation until now) said they wouldn't if I wasn't studying, so I had eight weeks to make enough to pay rent of £1200 and pay for my food and anything else I needed. My job isn't what I want to do for the rest of my life, but it gets me where I need to go for now, and it lets me do a lot of different things, like work in a bakery and make deliveries by bike, which are good things because they mean I'm moving about. As soon as I stop moving my body begins to hurt, so I'm standing up, walking around, cycling and even trying to run, and my body is starting to feel a bit better. This is a different kind of stress, one that doesn't follow me home or invade my dreams.

Treatment!!

My face looks weird at the moment, and I am SUPER self-conscious about it. I think about it probably 25% of the time. I'm nearing my surgery date (I tell people who ask about it that they're going to break my face, that's pretty much it - I'll be having double jaw surgery to correct my underbite in Summer, hopefully). My teeth hurt, My jaw hurts, My head hurts, because I still have braces, but in a year's time it should all be done with.

I'm excited to finally look better/normal, to be honest!

I also am waiting on treatment for my back, which is bent and twisted where it shouldn't be! Yes, this is painful, and yes, it gets in the way of my mobility. It is one of the reasons I halted my studies and I believe it was the right choice because I am happier and healthier than I could ever have been had I stayed at uni.

Happy reading, folks!

Victoria Jane

I need your help.

Hi folks, sorry it's been so long. It's nearly half three in the morning here and I'm tired, but this is when I think.

Hope you all had a good summer/winter (depending where you are). Summer in the UK was unbearably hot for about three weeks, then there was a HUGE thunderstorm with lots of lightning and things sort of reverted to normal.

So, back before Christmas, I was having trouble getting out of moods. I thought it might just be the weather (cold, rain, nastiness). It kind of went away a bit at Christmas because I was pretty busy. We had my cousins and my aunt over for Christmas lunch. As a slight tangent, my uncle died less than a week before Christmas. It was hell, it was a horrible situation, and it was odd. Not odd because he passed away (he was very ill), but odd because I wasn't sad for me at all. I was, and am, sad for my cousin, Tom.

Tom is thirteen. He was twelve, on the cusp of adolescence and about to need the one person who suddenly wasn't there. I've been constantly stressed about his mental and physical state for years (will explain in a moment), but obviously this is a major event for anyone to handle-particularly a child. He was quiet at the funeral. No tears. No facial expressions. Nothing. It's like he's gone. I remember when he was younger and actually had a personality. Imagine knowing someone, and then seeing them and who they are is gone.

So, back on track, the moods stayed for a while and then were forced away by exams and revision. I do this thing where, to deal with stress, I work. So that was dandy.

After exams, however, it kind of crept back. It's been four months since exams now and I seem to be getting further and further into this sort of hole.

I'm not talking about being sad, I'm talking about feeling like there's literally nothing I can do any more. Nothing. I feel like being away at uni, while fun and what I wanted to do for a long time, it isn't what I need to do.

What I need to do is look after Tom. That is what is keeping me alive. All I think about is being able to take him away from my aunt. My aunt, Linda, who feeds him the same food every day, because that's what his brother wants. Makes him do things because his brother wants to. Gives his brother the things we bring especially for him. He is so miserably pale and thin, and weak... and cold. Physically and emotionally, he's like a husk, a shell of a person. Everything revolves around his brother. His brother has autism. I know that's slightly debilitating, but Linda treats Adam like he's this golden boy who does no wrong. He ripped up some of Tom's stuff? "Accident".

On the way to their dad's funeral, Adam wouldn't turn down his TWO leappads. He is eleven. Tom took one off him to turn it down (which was what Linda had requested) and she hit him for it. And told him to behave.

The week before last, she blamed Adam's bad mood on Tom, saying Tom's eczema was to blame. He has eczema because he's constantly stressed and not fed ANY variety.

What I'm trying to say is, I want to save him. I have to. I love him like a brother, almost like a son. And I can't adopt him for another two years at least. I just watch him withering away, inside and out, day in, day out.

And I'm useless. I just watch it. I watch his manipulative brother and his stupid, myopic mother. And I see nobody paying attention to his needs. I see nobody seeing him. I see a boy who, every time he does exercise, he passes out. I see a boy my height but half my weight. I'm not overweight. He looks dead. He literally looks dead.

I'm scared. I'm terrified he's going to die, and he'll just slip away, and Linda will get away with having not looked after him properly. I'm scared I'll be too late to help him! I just cry and cry, every day.

What if I can't get to him in time? What if I can't help? I don't want him to go into care, I want to keep him and see him and know that he's safe, and maybe even happy. There's no light in his eyes. I think he's being killed.

What the hell do I do? Please, if anybody reads this and has suggestions, PLEASE just help me. 

That's all for now.

Exams are over... And so to work (I hope)

Hey there everybody,
Sorry for not posting. I was a) busy b) stressed and c) tired (Yes, this is a multiple choice, and yes, you may pick more than one answer).

Exams went quite badly. Thankfully, not all of this was my fault. I'll quickly explain the various problems before we digress onto more fun things!

Firstly, the Legal Method exam, 0930 on May 8th. Opening that exam was like receiving a very hard punch to the chest. We were given a case to pre-read (two weeks in advance) and to use in the exam for quotes and such. The exam being split into two parts, the case featured in all questions in part B. The exam's part A was loosely connected to the case. Part A was five 3mk (three mark) questions.

Part B, which we initially could not start, let alone complete, was a 5mk, a 15mk, and two 20mk questions. A small mercy was the fact that the first three questions could be attached to any case as they asked general things such as what the ratio decidendi (reason for deciding) was, but the last question was completely impossible. Imagine trying to climb Ben Nevis or Everest with no previous experience. You have been training for a competition. Your coach sets you cycling challenges. Now you're faced with a mountain instead and nothing you've learnt can help you. That's how that exam felt.

Also, and of no less (possibly of more) importance, we were told we would get extra time as many of us could not do the questions, and about an hour into the two hour exam we were then told there would be no extra time. Fun fun.

This event has completely rocked our confidence in the exams system at our uni. But! Next!

The second exam
This was Tort. It went quite well. I think it could have gone better but then I tend to miss things out when I get nervous.

The third exam
Public Law (formerly Constitutional and Administrative Law) also went pretty well, though I chose three essay questions and therefore sacrificed my hand (poor thing, it was all seized up at the end). What made this exam better was that it was an afternoon exam (excellent as I'm actually fully awake) and that Mario walked around the room for the first three minutes we were being seated. It was great and it really diffused the tension.

The fourth and final exam
I know I didn't do all that well here, on account of being very tired (exams 2, 3 and 4 were on consecutive days) and generally being too nervous again. Which I despise. Hopefully things will go better next year.


But! Until then, I'm updating my CV today and I'm going to try and get a job so that I can earn some money to help pay rent for next year. That's pretty much all I want to do this summer aside from pre-read for next year (the books arrive on June 14th and I'm looking forward to getting started because I'll be really bored otherwise. This year I have four months' holiday and there's not much else to do besides work to help ease off the stress for next year).

Phew!!

Happy reading, folks.

PS any CV tips would be most appreciated.

Thoughts... And a story

Yodel-o, folks, I'm sorry it's been such a long time.

I've had all manner of work to be getting on with, including a nice piece of coursework (which took quite a long time and I'm proud of it so no regrets there). I've also finished lectures for the year and am revising at the moment, for around five hours a day, and doing tons of other stuff like sleeping and playing guitar and spending time with others. I only finished the coursework less than two days ago so I'm still feeling the work-shock.

How are you? I hope you're all well and keeping yourselves busy. There's a lot for me to do before exams so I'm not really bored unless I'm ignoring the work I should be doing and in that case it's completely my fault.

Anyway, I had a story for you from WAY BACK WHEN (...Christmas. I have a story from Christmas time).

So, I was in a supermarket feeling pretty hungry. I was looking at the sandwiches and the sushi and this family of three comes in (I'm near the door). I don't notice them until the little boy (probably about eight, best guess) reaches in front of me and grabs a muffin quite hard, squishing it in the packet a bit. I think, 'that's kind of... uncoordinated'.

I then realise he is quite overweight. In fact, all three of these people are overweight. Very noticeably. I am trying to put this nicely.

He puts the muffin down elsewhere on the shelf and grabs a cookie. He turns to his (I assume) mum, and says "can I have this?"

And she doesn't even hesitate at all, she just says, "yeah, you've been good today so you can."

Incoming thoughts- 'look at your child! If he's been so good, reward him with something else, not a cookie. Not a sugary or fatty food or drink at all, actually.'

Quite frankly, the only reward this child needed was a diet. Judging his size he was probably four, maybe four and a half feet tall, and weighed either the same or not much less than me. I'm about nine and a half stone (60.3 kilos-ish).

So then that got me thinking. How we eat is most definitely learnt from the people around us when we are children, at least in part. My mum eats healthily but doesn't eat often. I try to eat regularly but particularly when I'm busy I'll accidentally forego breakfast and lunch in a day. I don't even realise I've forgotten until my stomach starts making these awful rumbles (like an Empty-Bellystorm, tehe).

Surely, if your child has done something right, if you ARE going to reward them with something tangible (which, I'm told, is a bad habit as it leads to materialistic views), better it be something interesting and/or something that promotes health (whether that be mental or physical)...

What are your views on this, though? I'm not sure how strict my parents were compared to others when I was growing up- maximum one fast food meal a week and one or two chocolate bars. All I can remember is that I would think something along the lines of (a more childish version of) "Aw yiss - muthafuckin Twily Whirly Day" on the chocolate bar days. I loved those Twirly Whirlies. They were the greatest thing. Pity I can't eat them any more.

Back to the point. What do you think? If you were/are a parent, what would be your policy or reward of choice? How did your parents reward you? Do you think giving children food when they behave "well" perpetuates bad habits? Views would be greatly appreciated. You can email me at victoriaandthewolf@gmail.com if you've got something to say, or comment below :)

Happy reading folks, and sorry for not posting more often! Life is busy.

PS I'm hoping to do more posts during the summer months, but we'll see how that goes.

Victoria Jane

3 Reasons I'm an Awful Person

I've decided that I apologise a lot for a reason. Aside from the fact I'm British (and we're rumoured to do such things as apologise a lot and drink tea), I've been below the expected standard for a while now in terms of my blogging and other areas, though you won't know about those.

So, I apologise. And I mean it. I really do; I never intend to leave such great chasms between posts and it's always with regret that I neglect my schedule. But quite honestly there's a little bit of irony going on here because the more interesting and time-consuming stuff I have going on, the less time I have to write about it. Much the same happens, I assume, with very rich people (the ones who work for their money, anyway).

1) I procrastinate.
Like a professional procrastinator (I swear I'd get a qualification in such a thing if I didn't keep putting it off), I find wonderful ways of avoiding work and other things I need to do. I need to stretch for Taekwondo? Oh, I'm tired. I need to go and get in some cardio? I just ate, I should probably leave it... Oh, it's too late now. Shoot.
I know, I really do, how it can be annoying when someone doesn't write when they've said they would. Honestly I have wanted to. But as a result of procrastination (ongoing to an extent) I have had to do more work recently than I thought possible.

2) I'm highly emotional.
Being overly happy (not often) or sad (much more often) can really get in the way of work. But I'll tell you now, nothing halts my studies like apathy. Recently (if I'm truthful it's ever since I came back after Christmas) I've been feeling probably 80% at best, and I'm tired even when I get enough sleep. I miss my mum and Patrick, I miss my hometown, I miss having a little more freedom and mostly I want to be earning money.
While I'm at university, earning money through a part-time job seems impossible. I'm exhausted when I get in from lectures and seminars and by the end of the day I really just want to have a shower and relax.
Even though I'm studying, I feel like I'm not in the right place.

3) I may well have made the wrong choice in coming to university.
This was actually going to be a blogpost of its own at one point a little while back. I honestly cannot see myself being happy here for the next two and a half years. I feel as though I'm walking away from work for now and I feel like that might well be a bad thing.
I also feel like I'm completely ungrateful considering I've worked towards this my whole life and now I'm not happy here. My place could easily have gone to someone else who deserved it more and who wanted it and would have enjoyed it more than I would have. This is extremely upsetting in terms of the repercussions of having such thoughts. Not only do I feel lost as to what to do, but I'm now weighing up the two options I have.

Stay at university

• Worked hard to get here
• money already invested is in thousands
• waste of a year if I quit
• Risk disappointing my family
• May not be able to get a job if I leave
• Throwing away opportunity
• I don't want to leave my Taekwondo club
• I like the city 
• The studies and semesters are just about bearable

Do something else

• I'm likely to be much happier
• I can start saving money to help send my cousin to university if he wants to go
• I'll feel less alone
• More work experience, possibly in something interesting and useful
• Cuts my losses (uni costs about £20,000/year including tuition, food and accommodation)
• I constantly feel out of place, like I should really be somewhere else
• I like being at home
• I want to do what I want to do, not what I think is expected of me

...Bearing in mind that I don't just count the points on either side but also the weight of each. For example, I may waste a year if I quit but I may be wasting time being here and being unhappy when I could find work and start saving.

To be honest, when I thought I'd failed my exams I really wasn't all that bothered because part of me really wanted to get a job instead of going to university and now that can't happen unless I quit because I don't have the time or the energy to do both. The main problem comes from the possibility that if I quit I'll be limiting my opportunities to almost definitely less than they would be were I to stay and finish the degree. I really need to choose by June or July so I can make preparations and such.

Any thoughts would be welcome. Email me or comment. victoriaandthewolf@gmail.com

P.S my one true respite is reading still! I'm reading Jilly Cooper's series, the Rutshire Chronicles (begins with "Riders", fantastic book).

Happy Reading, folks!

Victoria Jane

(Not so) festive update

So, hi again, everybody, I'm sorry for not posting earlier but life has been pretty up and down so far this month! I see it's over a month since my last post and I thought maybe you'd like an update.

Christmas (today) has been pretty good. Good food, good company, and the house wasn't too down and that’s lovely. We had my cousins and my aunt over for Christmas lunch. They've never been to ours for Christmas but we wanted to get them out of the house considering my uncle passed away a week ago. It's been quite awful trying to deal with grief and still manage to function well enough to arrange a funeral. I advise all of you (jokingly, somewhat, since we can't choose the times these things happen) not to pass away around this time; we cannot have the funeral for another three weeks because these things need time and preparation and nobody is willing to do that sort of thing around Christmas time.

I'm taking it as a sign of logic that I'm not overwhelmingly upset, partially because I rarely saw my uncle and partially because I like to be a helping hand in times such as these, rather than another lost and crumpled soul. I have to be honest with you all, at the moment all I want to do is make sure people are okay and then get back to university, but this calls for family time and I like to think of us as sticking together in situations such as these. Note this is the same set of people as the one I wrote about before, containing the cousin I wanted to write a book for. I couldn’t get it done (not even started). I have no idea what to say now. As I prepared to write, this new development came along and now the family is simultaneously torn apart and pulled together by sadness.

Anyway, we’re waiting to have the funeral and I’m not leaving until everything is settled down. Thankfully I don’t start next semester until quite a way into January and so I can stay here without missing anything. I do want to go back early though, so I have some quiet time and I can just be by myself. I was looking forward to the holidays but so far they’ve been full of sadness and business (the two things you don’t always really enjoy on holiday if I’m honest). 

I'll be pretty busy covering the work I did last semester soon, and I'll try to get another post in between now and returning to uni. 

Happy reading, folks!

Victoria Jane.

Bitte entschuldigen Sie!!

One word to you all, dear readers, and that word is perseverance. I'm not afraid and not sorry to say that there have been good reasons for my not posting in a while!

Studying.
I have been sitting at my desk, and various other desks, and on my bed, and at the kitchen table, and I've been thinking and formulating and assimilating (to an extent) all this information we, as law students on the course, have been exposed to. Lectures are a welcome introduction to topics, believe me, but gosh are they fleeting. Oh, what a brief window of interest they open for us! And then the hard work begins. In lectures, I sit and I take notes and I assume I'm making sense of all the words and phrases and images I'm given to make sense of, but of course it's passive learning. And so I have to go away and read and commit myself to hours of thinking about the same things and working out how all those things fit together. It's wonderful, readers! I'm really enjoying myself learning things at university.
But of course the result of all this time-consuming studying is that I get good marks. I am getting good marks and I am very proud and because of that I can truly say that I feel I am spending my time well here. Of course I take time off! Of course I spend time procrastinating, and watching movies, and reading non-academic books, and sleeping and eating and just relishing being able to think. So far I've given in two essays. The first was a 2:1 (a high B) and the second was a 1st (an A). I am enjoying that. And then today we participated in a  test in class, multiple choice but quite difficult all the same, and I scored 35/36.

...Baking?
It was Patrick's birthday at the weekend and so I went home for four days. We baked a lovely chocolate cake on Friday, which we didn't finish until after his birthday dinner on Saturday, when I made the ganache and put it on. That word's a link because EVERYONE I told asked what ganache was and I couldn't define it well.

Here's a picture of the birthday boy exercising his self-control with said cake.

Pat, I gotta say, honey, you could probably fit that whole cake in your mouth in less than ten bites.

It's a pretty big cake, I tell you! It was/is lovely (I still have a slice keeping me company up in Oxford). I also bought Pat an Euler's disk, because he really loves physics and he specifically asked for one. Youtube it and see how they work, they're pretty cool (and heavy).

I got the recipe for the cake here, it is delicious, I recommend you all try it. I am having a lot of fun with the whole baking shebang now I'm older and able to do all that stuff I didn't understand when I was younger.

...Didn't stop me from melting a spatula when making the ganache, though. Moving on!


Coursework obligations
I have a piece of coursework due this Friday, which I am currently part of the way through writing, and two pieces due in three and a half weeks' time, so I'm likely to be quite busy between now and then! However, I will try to write after that, which shouldn't be too difficult as my Christmas holidays start once I've handed those in, so I should be back home for roughly December 15th. This is an exciting last month of my first semester at university, I must say! I'm being careful not to do so much work that I burn out and do terribly next year, but I also want to do well this year because I want a proper foundation year (looks good on CVs and also to any prospective employers to show that I'm trying hard even when it's not completely necessary!

I would put up some coursework extracts but we're not allowed for reasons such as cheating and plagiarism. Sorry folks! Don't hesitate to ask questions if you want to, though.

Happy reading, folks!

Victoria Jane

Purpose.

I'm not saying we're here for a specific purpose or that life is a wonderful miracle. I don't want to project an image of myself as someone very philosophical or anything like that. I like people to know I have thoughts, though. I find it somewhat satisfying that someone could be interested in the things in my head.

So, I've been going to Taekwon Do every day that I can (it only runs Thursdays and Fridays but some Fridays I go home to see my family) and I can feel myself getting stronger and faster. This is a good change, certainly. It feels like I am achieving something.
For years and years I felt pressure to be thin and to never lose my temper and to be helpful to people all the time, but then I realised that thin is not necessarily healthy and keeping your cool all the time is virtually inhuman, there have to be some things that annoy you, sometimes, and sometimes it's okay not to lend others a hand and to just have some time to yourself. I think everybody needs that.

I've been reading a lot recently, and I found this, which is interesting. I don't think being married is anything different than being in a relationship, but that's not the significance of it. I was particularly interested in point seven on that list, because quite frankly it's not a burden worrying about someone and being young and carefree doesn't go hand in hand, completely, with being alone. Again, I'm not trying to project an image of philosophy; nor am I saying that everybody simply must have someone to be with (come on! Nobody NEEDS a boyfriend, it's not a concept you should view in that way, in my opinion). My relationship does cause me some worry, of course; I care about Pat very much, and I do worry a bit sometimes. But he makes life a lot more bearable when I've had a terrible day (don't think, honey, that I merely use you to make myself feel better).

But yes, purpose. My purpose in life has never been set, but rather quite loosely defined as what I find important at that moment. At this time I'm interested in learning about Law (good thing, that) and improving my Taekwon Do skills.

Recently, I have been reading this blog. It's written by a man whose younger son has autism, and it documents, to an extent, what effect this has had on family, and general, life. I have a cousin with autism and there is a whole huge area of grey in my knowledge about the condition, though I know the basics-  that it's lifelong, incurable, and prevents normal social interaction to an extent. But I must say that the man's child has high-functioning autism, which is not as severe at what my little cousin has. I say "has" and not "suffers from" because, as horrible as it may sound, I really think he doesn't care all that much, but we do, and it affects the lives of my mother's side of the family quite extensively. I have had to, in the past (and we're talking five years ago) literally pull other children off my cousin. Bullies can be cruel. He doesn't understand how awful they're being either.

But A (his name genuinely starts with that letter, I'm not initial-ing him autistic) isn't who I'm worried about, it's his older brother, T. I love T a huge amount, and the sadness I feel for his predicament is something I will never cease to bear. He not only has almost no support and praise from his parents but also must deal with, every day and night for the rest of his life, the fact his younger brother has autism. It will always be a part of his mind. I worry for him, this once promising and bright child, whose personality, aspirations and livelihood have dulled under the weight of his burden. At twelve (now) he is expected to fully understand his brother's condition and deal with it as well as his parents do (they don't, really). T was a very bright child, and I mean that; he learnt to read analogue clocks before I did, and I had six years on him. I was genuinely jealous at one point. But now? Now, I feel anger and pity. Anger that he was wasted, ignored, left to almost raise himself. He has to eat what his brother eats, which isn't much. He has to live around his brother. He has to work around the entire situation, and believe me, A is quite the situation.

I would never say it is A's fault, but he can be very challenging to deal with. Partly, he has autism. Partly, he's a complete bastard because his parents have let him grow to always get what he wants. As a result my favourite cousin (sorry all other cousins) has completely lost the light in his life. He did badly in school last year. He can't bring friends home. He has no escape. Secondary school is a car journey from his house and during that journey I can bet you anything there is either silence or lectures revolving around A. Or T's lack of performance. How do you expect him to do well if you won't help? He's not an adult, you control him as his parents, to some extent. You let his little brother break his things and ruin his stuff and you blame it on autism or on him, and you're going to have an unhappy child.

As a result, I've resolved to write him a little book. Of my thoughts. Of what I feel. Of how I want to help. Of how everything is unfair and I see that and how mum and I have secret plans to steal him away for a day and we'll do whatever the hell he wants all day and he can eat and sleep and just not give a care that his little brother is autistic, for one day. Removing the burden. And hopefully he'll see that there are people who think he's not getting as much individual time and love as he deserves.

I'd genuinely not mind if he went to live with my mum, although it would be difficult. I'd love to see him more. I want his mobile number so we can text without his mum knowing; it'd be difficult but I'm sure there's a way.  My purpose is to write my little cousin a book to make him a little bit less miserable this Christmas, because it quite literally (I think it's the stress of thinking of being in that situation) makes my heart hurt when I imagine him all bored and upset and alone in that house, every day.

If you have any comments, please send them to me here. I'd love to read them.

Happy reading, folks!!

Changes!!

Hello readers! A mighty quick update for you from the lovely me (ah, who am I kidding?) to say that I've changed the name of the blog (as you can clearly see!). Now, the domain name for this is already taken, so I won't be changing the website address just yet, but at least if I do I'll give a couple weeks notice, so don't worry about that.

I never thought I'd do this really. Not that I thought I wouldn't, as such, but it never really occurred to me before, as it has recently, that the old name of my blog (everything I own [now]) seems very materialistic and therein lies the problem. I'm not materialistic. Happiness, in my opinion, should not be based on material items and their value (never let it be said that I'll forgive you for buying a cheap coat, though. There is cost effective, where you get good value for money, and then there is downright cheap, where your clothing falls apart and you complain even though you only paid a fiver for it).

Hence, I declare this blog to now be called Wired Weird! The principal principle (oho!) behind this change is to reflect how very odd and convoluted a place my mind can be, and seeing as you delve into it on a somewhat regular and somewhat frequent basis, I consider it false advertising to call myself anything close to "wired normally".

Happy reading, folks! There will probably by another post soooooooooooooooooooooon (extra Os intentional, based on the fact it was Hallowe'en yesterday)!

Work, eat, sleep

the title is pretty much my priorities at the moment. I'm doing a lot of work (not begrudgingly but willingly, mind you) and there isn't a whole lot of time for other things at the moment, which is a pity. But never mind. I've got pretty much everything done I wanted to get done, except the work for Tort Law, which is due on Thursday. I have time because like a particularly well-organised student I did the work for the other three modules over the weekend and so it hasn't been rushed and panicked, but instead patiently worked through as it should be. Which is what I enjoy the most about my life at the moment. There's time to do things.

I promised you all a picture of the flowers!!

They are truly lovely. And I still have them even though it's been more than a week (they're not over yet). They smell FANTABULOUS (yes, it is a real word) because there's Eucalyptus in the bunch, as well. So my whole room smells of Eucalyptus now. Not complaining at all. Thank you, Patrick!

I'm reading The Godfather by Mario Puzo in my spare time (scoff, scoff, chortle, chortle). I felt bad having seen the films and not read the books, which I really think I should have done first, but never mind. You can't do everything as you'd intend to do it. And besides, the films are rather good. If for whatever reason (coma? you're a hobbit? you have no self-esteem? lack of time/money?) you haven't either seen the films or read the books, I suggest you rectify that. I always find it amazing reading or watching these "classics". How did this come out of someone's head? It's an incredible phenomenon that we have such active imaginations, I tell you that.

I've had coldy-flueyness this week, unfortunately, so I'm not as lovely and happy and bouncy as I'd perhaps have liked, but that's not really a problem. I'm going home at the weekend again, to see my mum for a bit. I never feel like we get to spend much time together so I'm working through everything I need to do in preparation for that. I also have an assignment due in next week that I need to do the preliminary reading for, which means either going to the library or hooking up my printer (not difficult but time-consuming).

Happy reading, folks! I can't tell you how nice it is, having you read these posts. It means a lot to me, not because I WANT you to read them, but because you're interested in what I say (whether you agree or disagree is interesting too, so please comment if you can).

Victoria Jane :D

Visiting family

So I took this weekend off (after handing in that Assignment, I needed a break!) and went home for the first time in a month! It's the longest I've ever been away from home. Once when I was younger I camped with a cousin for two weeks and going back home felt pretty good. So, after a month of being in a new, confusing city, doing work and generally not knowing where many things are, going home was not only AMAZING because it meant I could see my family, but because it also gave me the chance to be lazy with directions and   cooking. I got there Friday evening and went skating (the first time in a month, it was a relief to realise I can still skate to be honest!!), before having dinner at home. Just pasta and sauce but actually eating with my mum was really lovely.

I also (as you would) went to see my lovely other half, Patrick. I take great delight in surprising him, so I told him I'd be there on Saturday morning for hugs and such, and even called him while I was outside my house, saying goodnight... And then I got a lift to his and opened the front door VERY quietly and took my suitcase up the stairs VERY quietly... And walked into his room. And he freaked out! It was fantastic. He was sat in bed, saying "What are you doing here?!" and he had the BIGGEST smile on his face. Made it worth the effort of lying to him all week, definitely. He also bought me a LOVELY bouquet of white roses, which are my favourite flowers! I've never had flowers bought for me before, so that was a lovely surprise.

So we spent the evening chatting and then went out the next afternoon, after I'd been to the opticians to get some new glasses (I stood on mine, poor things, they're bent beyond all functionality) and check my prescription. My head has widened, they said, and I had to explain that it was because of the metal stretcher I used to have in my mouth. For reference, I used to get one Shreddie stuck between my opposite back teeth. The gap is now wide enough for a Party Ring. It's nice to know all the pain was worth it!!

In the afternoon, we went out for lunch (ham, egg and chips is an amazing meal and if you disagree there is something fundamentally wrong with you), then for a milkshake. Patrick bought a banoffee one that was so thick, he couldn't finish it, which I think was a foreign concept to him (he looked very confused). We also went out for dinner with my dad, so I am certainly well-fed now!

I currently have reading to do for the morning ( a side effect of not doing work all weekend is catch-up work that needs to be done), so I'm off to do that.

I will upload a picture of the flowers with my next post!!

Happy reading, folks!!

Looks and books

Hey hey! I'm just into my fourth week at university and having a great time so far. Sorry or not having posted (I know I said I would) but I've been busy!!

so, I've been preparing my first assessment (a piece of coursework due in at the end of this week), which is for Foundational Legal Skills. This part of the course is 100% coursework. I need to do some pretty interesting things for assessments here at the university, and I like that they don't spoon feed us the information, because it means we KNOW if we're not doing enough work. It's very autonomous and you control the outcome of everything quite strongly here. So, I spent maybe twenty hours in the last three days reading and doing little bits towards this assessment. I didn't feel like I was prepared to even start writing until last night!
 So obviously this means that I am busy and hungry and don't always have time for meals. But, like any good student should, and particularly one who tends to get ill when when they don't eat enough, I have cheats. Now, these lovely little thingies on the right are a new-ish product from Nutri-grain. They're called Breakfast Biscuits (as you can see) and they're really good if you're on the way to an epiphany, meaning you don't have the time or patience to deal with your grandparent of a cooker. You get six packs of four biscuits. They're perfect. They're yummy. They stop me from fridge-raiding.

 Everyone has a favourite drink as well! Mine is this stuff by a company called Tymbark, which is a Polish company. It's not very sweet, which is why I like it. The only problem is that I can get through a two-litre pack in about four hours.

So, this is my room! Accommodation is quite expensive, but it was worth paying for because, though it's not in the picture, I have a little en-suite too. Again, this is a good study-aid. I don't have to make any long trips just to have a shower or brush my teeth, and I like that rather a lot. It also happens to be good when I'm sore from training, because I don't do a whole lot of walking about at the moment. My knees hyperextend as a result of skating, and now I'm doing Taekwondo, they hurt quite a lot. I spent £40 on knee straps. It was worth it- I could actually walk today! I bought Elastoplast ones. They're fantastic.

So, yes. My room has lots of study space and the bed isn't too bad either (kind of a bad mattress but I'm always VERY tired by the time I go to bed so I don't really have an awareness of it for long. Taekwondo is fantastic. I'm enjoying pretty much everything about university, except that I miss my family. An unfortunate side-effect of loving people is that you feel a little empty when they're not with you. But I'm training four hours a week and studying maybe thirty or forty hours a week. and then I eat and sleep and explore. And life is good.

I'm going home this weekend!! It'll be great to see the lovely other half, Patrick for the first time in a month, I am very excited!!!

happy reading, folks!

Rank and file

Hello again! It may have been a little while, but I have a good reason: I've moved house! Well, that's a lie, kind of. I've moved to university! I feel it's all a bit rank and file from now on, because there are a heck of a lot of students here and we're all numbered (on our flashy student cards, which happen to match all the towels I've brought with me- style mistake? Or victory?)...

It was quite difficult packing all my stuff and leaving mum, but I'm having a great time here. So far, I've met all my flatmates, a lot of the people on my course, and some of the professors here too. Everybody is lovely and friendly and it's very liberating having to do everything for myself.

So, this week I've been doing the pre-reading for a module on my course, which starts on Monday. The actual module in question starts on Tuesday, but there's no harm in doing a little bit of work ahead of time to help get myself into the swing of things, right?

So, how are you all? Good? Well? Healthy? You know those New Year's resolutions, the ones that are impossible to keep? Well, I made a "New Academic Year" resolution, because it's easy to make all those changes at once; and I don't regret it. I have joined a Taekwondo course. So far, and for the foreseeable future, we train (and will train) on Thursdays and Fridays. Yes, Thursday was painful and fun. Yes, Friday felt like suicide. Yes, it was completely worth it. I am proud. I am proud that it hurts to walk and that my calves are so tight I can barely walk down stairs. I am proud that I have stretched, sprinted, side-stepped, punched and kicked my way to pain. I enjoy the experience, and I enjoy chatting to others on the course while we all get the crap kicked out of us, by ourselves. It's really, really painful and really, really fun, because it's nothing like anything I've done before. I recommend it highly!!

So, I'm starting my degree on Monday. Freshers' week has been good too, although I do miss my family. And my feet hurt a bit from running around barefoot, but it's a mark of self-discipline if you don't complain out loud, really (that or involuntary mutism, I guess).

Happy reading, Folks!

P.S. Soon, as promised, you'll all meet Christmouse, whom I have chosen as my partner for shenanigans now I'm here at university! He's friendly, he's a mouse, he sings carols, and I got him in my stocking, hence his name. Speak to you soon!!

The pain of not moving

One of the reasons I don’t post very often (well, ain’t this post a lil’ funny then?) is that, quite honestly, sitting at the computer for hours is a largely uneventful and painful experience for me. I don’t have anything particularly wrong with me, but as a result of various incidents I find it painful to sit down for long periods of time.

You know that way you sit in bed and read a book? I have to have my bed in the corner and sit quite upright if I want to do that for anything longer than a couple of minutes. The bottom of my spine really doesn’t like prolonged pressure and it makes it difficult to do things people find relaxing, like have a bath or sit and read. I suppose it’s a good thing, because it means I don’t sit around all day (something I have tried rather unsuccessfully to do today, in fact) and I get more done. Walking around aimlessly is awfully boring. It’s good for thinking, but I prefer longer walks for that sort of thing.

Even now, as I type, it’s very uncomfortable. My neck doesn’t like it, my back doesn’t like it and my legs take about half an hour to recover every time I do this. Exams are a nightmare and I find that I break my concentration by moving around in the seat a lot. But there you go, no matter! I was, more than anything, wondering if anybody else feels like that. I find it very annoying; I have to go to a physiotherapist for the duration of exam season because the studying leaves me unable to sleep.

The main problem is either having had whiplash a while ago that was never fully resolved, or the ridiculously unbalanced amount of muscle I have on my back. The right side has about three times as much muscle as the left, due to my being lazy with sports training and not practising elements (of any sport that requires feet) both ways around. It sucks. I tell you (more like warn), don’t do it. It results in annoying cramps and rucksacks are never comfortable.

But enough! How were the cookies? I hope a couple of you tried to make them. I’d make them more often myself if it weren’t for the fact that I eat them all one after the other.

I always forget to mention, if anyone has questions about me, you can always send them here (as in, comment below). I’ll set up an email address for correspondence in the future.

Happy reading, folks!

Victoria Jane 

Très Apologétique (COOKIE RECIPE)

Hello, everybody! (Hi, Dr. Nick...)

Many, many apologies for not having been in touch earlier! I hope you're all well. I have news! And then, of course, I'll give you that recipe that I've been holding on to for so long (I bet you've all forgotten about it by now).

So, results day for A2 students was back on August 16th (last Thursday to the less formal readers out there, hey hey) and of course we were all pretty nervous. But, by some intervention (known by normal people as "revision" and "good fortune" I managed to get good enough results to get into university, and so did my boyfriend, and most of our friends (the ones who applied anyway). So it was a great day! I got an A* and two Bs, and the other half managed an astounding A*AAB combination. I'm very proud of both of us.

So, off to uni, to study Law LLB, and I've decided to take a qualifying Law degree, which means I'll be able to become a barrister or solicitor afterwards. I look forward to it. My lovely other half is off to study Computer Science, possibly filling his dreams of being a mole for the rest of his life (I imagine he'll do well at uni, I really do).

Right! On to the recipe! Now, this makes some lovely ginger cookies (or you can leave the ginger out and substitute other things, like cinnamon at Christmas) and I'll tell you all the tricks I've come up with to help make the process as successful as possible. Here we go!

Ingredients:

• 125g unsalted butter (I use Stork in a tub, it's fantastic)
• 100g dark muscovado sugar
• 4 tbsp golden syrup (Tate and Lyle!!)
• 325g self raising flour
• 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda
• 2 tsp ground ginger

Utensils:
Glass mixing bowl
Dessert spoon
Saucepan (medium-large, non-stick)
Oven, Hob
Scales
Teaspoon
Greaseproof paper
Baking sheet x 2
Fork

Method:

1) Put your saucepan on the scales. Put in the butter and sugar, and the golden syrup. It's better to use four dessert spoons of golden syrup; the cookies are still going to be quite moist, don't worry. Then, put this on the hob and let it all melt together on a medium-high heat (I use around a 7 out of 9). You can stir if you like, but if you leave it on there it'll bubble and stir itself as a result. Just don't let it boil over!! Turn the oven to 180 Celsius (350-355 Fahrenheit).

2) Take your flour, powdered ginger and the bicarbonate of soda and (after weighing the flour) mix them all in a bowl, using a fork. Once they are thoroughly mixed and the butter/sugar/syrup mix has bubbled for a minute or so, pour that hot liquid (BE VERY CAREFUL OR IT WILL BURN YOU) into the dry ingredients, and stir it all together. It can get quite tough, and it will most certainly begin to rise.

3) Cover your metal baking sheets in the greaseproof paper and spoon spheres of cookie mix (around two-three teaspoons' size each) onto them at intervals of around five-eight cm.

4) Pop them in the oven, and wait about four to five minutes. After five minutes-ish, they'll cool to a soft but firm consistency and they're great with cold milk.

TIPS

Do NOT store them touching each other! Because of the syrup, they'll all stick together and form into one giant cookie-lump. (May not be a bad thing)
You can add chocolate chips to the mix! White chocolate chips are great.
They can be reheated in the oven (two or three mins at 160 Celsius) or the microwave (not more than 10 seconds or they burn).

Have fun and be careful! I've found them quite addictive, but they're really, really lovely so I'm not mad at myself.

Happy reading, folks!

Victoria Jane

Hello, stranger(s)!

I'll be the first to admit, it's been an abominably long time since I last posted, and I've not been particularly busy either, so I'd have to say that quite frankly, I'm just sorry. I've copped out. I've been a bit of a baby. 

My exams went... overall, disappointingly. With this phrase, I mean, I feel the first two exams went very well but the third and last exam, the two hour one in the afternoon... that came two hours after a three hour exam... That one didn't go so well. I put this down to a number of factors.

1) I completely underestimated the amount of time I'd need to revise the ten necessary chapters effectively.  I revised them, I did, but not nearly well enough. And that exam happened to want a lot of detail.

2) I didn't sleep enough. Not just the night before the exam, but in the month preceding exams in general, I was getting five or six hours a night, which truly just isn't enough. I reckon nine hours would have been better. 

3) Law, which was the last exam, was the hardest exam. And because it was the last exam, I had almost no choice but to revise more for the others. 

4) After the end of term, I generally need three to four weeks to relax. This is non-optional. I literally stop functioning as a responsible adult and student for this period of time and as such was unable to revise, which was the ONLY thing I should have been doing. Really. And I messed it up.

For these reasons, and the fact that I am somewhat angry at myself, I am afraid you'll have to wait for the major reason you've wanted this next post, which is, of course, the cookie recipe (Wooo! I tried it again the other day and it is STILL amazing and very yummy)... But yes, next time! 

Happy reading, folks!! 

Victoria Jane

Obligations

Well, it's been busy, I won't lie to you. But I like being busy, it stops me feeling useless. Getting ready for exams is kind of one of those challenges that I always begrudgingly start doing, and then realise it's not all that bad and can actually be quite "alright" (I can't bring myself to say fun, but it's almost there) to do.

My revision consists of reading, past papers, markschemes, examiner's comments on bygone exam papers, and   quite frankly more reading. I also have a (sometimes annoying) habit of having to research certain interesting bits of my courses before I'll answer questions on them in the exams, because I'm loathe to put in information that I don't fully understand. That's much lower level than what I want to achieve.

All of this preparation comes at a price, and that price is nil. It is free. I can only get better. It's a beautiful thing indeed, is revision.

Anyway, clearly this means there are obligations. We all have obligations to work at this time of year if we want to get the required grades for our universities. For example, Mr. P has an exam tomorrow. I'll be there to wish him luck, and then I'm off to my own classes and to do things that I need to do. I've done two exam papers today (that's five hours), but left time (or rather made time) for other stuff as well. I cycled four and a half miles before school. I did an hour and a half of paid work. I supported my friends and boyfriend, all of whom have many more exams than I do and therefore make me feel like complaining would be a silly and unnecessary thing to do at this point. All we can do is work as hard as possible. Which brings me round to my next point.

You need fuel! Now, cookies aren't the healthiest fuel, by all means, but they are darned nice. Which is why in my next post (IF I REMEMBER, erk) I will share with you all the recipe for my rather lovely gingerbread cookies. They started out as a biscuits recipe but have since morphed into the little chunks of heaven I am sure to be a billionaire selling, Or I would be if I wasn't sharing the secret with you all for free.

Happy reading, folks!

(also, reading an EXCELLENT book at the moment called French Children Don't Throw Food, will report more upon completion).

It's been a while!

I'd like to open with a quick refresher, as it could be seen to be. I don't write this blog specifically so people can read it, and I don't aim for high ratings or lots of subscribers. It's more a good way to get interesting things written/typed out so I can find them again. A public online memory box, as it were.


So, let me tell you about recent events, there's been a great deal of development (if that's what you can call it). I would go into the cliche'd "I met a guy and he's great" thing, but in truth it's been three months now and we're pretty much together 80% of the time. He's lovely. He's Irish (NOT a selling point but an interesting fact nonetheless!). He's tall and blonde and we go to the same college. We were friends for a year first, which is a really excellent way of getting to know someone and their likes and dislikes... We like all the opposite things, pretty much. It makes everything more interesting (obviously there are some similarities otherwise we'd be at odds all the time and it'd suck).


Well, what can I tell you? His name is Patrick. He's most excellent. I really dislike being sentimental on the blog, but I'm in love with him and he more than deserves a mention, even though I've been hiding him away to myself for a while. I taught him to cycle. It's odd to think such a clever guy (mathematical genius) wouldn't be able to grasp that skill that I find so essential. Anyway, it means he steals my bike on a regular basis (the bike he broke, poor thing. He fell off it and the brake actually snapped).

Exams coming up soon, I have one on June 13th and two on June 15th, which means I'll be very busy doing worky things from now on. Unsurprisingly, this year is more stressful than the last, because quite frankly this decides whether I can continue the rest of my life in the way that I want to or not (ideally university as of September, but conditional offers mean that I have to get certain grades). I need an A and two Bs. Not particularly difficult IF I get my head down and do the damn work. Thankfully all my courses are pretty interesting, so I shouldn't have a problem actually doing work.


Of course, exhaustion is the one thing that gets in the way of studying more than anything else. Or rather, a bad exam day. That day on the 15th? I have FIVE HOURS of examinations. And I am to be escorted everywhere by a supervisor between those two exams, which have a two hour break. The first exam is German, which is three hours long. THREE HOURS!


If I'm still alive afterwards, I'll tell you of my next plans.


Happy Reading, folks!


Victoria Jane :D

Social sudoku

Buying something for someone else is not an uncommon event in my life. Indeed, I buy plenty enough for my friends and family when they need something in particular, and I love buying silly things to make my boyfriend smile... But what about the time when the recipient of the item you're buying is likely to judge you? What if it's an event that you can't ignore, like Christmas... Or a birthday? This brings me to the main point of today's post: What do you buy as a present for someone you don't know very well but must seek to please nonetheless? a little bit about getting presents for other people recently.

Now, this hasn't stemmed from nothing; it hasn't come out of the blue. No, no, it is in fact my mother's boyfriend's birthday on Sunday (well done, mother's boyfriend, your birthday coincides with Easter. Your birthday is completely overshadowed by a social expectation that you must have bought me an egg).

Now, the easiest thing to do when finding presents for people (or at least getting ideas) is to find out what they like, or enjoy, and focus on things based around that. Your first frame of reference is how much you're willing to spend. Set this out first, and stick to it. Note that there should be a minimum amount of about £10 (I'd say roughly $16) if you're buying presents for someone you like/respect. If you don't either like or respect the person you're buying presents for, don't buy presents.

So, Mum's boyfriend likes... Beer (I'm not 18 so I can't buy that yet), Cars (pah!), and racing (tickets? Pah again!). This means I'll default to all things RELATED to the things he likes. Hence, beer and car relatgetted jokes and presents. What's affordable? What's within my price range (I'm capping at £20 as a student with a part time job)? Well, this leaves me with fewer options.

I've already done all the deliberation, and decided that as a joint present there will be beer, and later in the week, a mug with a picture of a car on it. And hopefully mum's boyfriend will be especially pleased when he finds that the picture of the car is in fact HIS car. If any of you are thinking that might be a little, er, lame, he owns one of these.

I'm mainly relying on the beer; you can't go wrong provided you know their favourite brand of alcohol or food. As I said, it's always a time-saver to appeal to their happy side by buying things you know they like, just in large quantities.

The other way to buy a kickass present is to appeal to a more secretive side of the recipient's personality; this is particularly useful in buying presents for people you know very well, though don't go over the top, clearly. Also do remember who you're buying for; buying your parents clothes is kind of acceptable; buying them 36 cans of Relentless/Monster/Coca Cola may not go down as well.

Good luck in your present quests!!

Happy reading, folks! Victoria Jane

P.S. Apologies for the infrequency of posts, I'm working on academic schtuff and am therefore rather busy much of the time. When exams pass I may (but not definitely) have more time on my hands to talk to you all. Thank you!