Mind your Ps and Qs (please. Thank you.)

As a teenager, and a Briton, I feel people who do not know me often stereotype me. Everybody becomes aware of certain labels they have placed upon them. We often, unfortunately, are then treated accordingly. This leads to something of a self-sulfilling prophecy in some cases- where a person is labelled as something and through interactions with others they change to fit their label.

For the sake of this post, being a teenager is something a great majority of the humans on this planet endure. So I'm using that as the basis for my next argument, which is (in England at least) STOP being moody and thinking you have to say intelligent things all the time. STOP expecting people to always help you. But mainly, please please PLEASE stop forgetting to use your manners.

I know we are in a recession, okay? I know you have exams. I know you're unhappy because your dog's ill, or your grandmother passed away, or you've run out of foundation. I know that life could probably be going better, and I know that sometimes there are moments when you think it'd be great to just sleep until all the problems have gone away. Whether you're having trouble at school, at home, or at work, it still constitutes very little effort to use manners.

I have been brought up to hold doors for people. Don't misunderstand this as chivalry- I just do it. I do it for you. I do it for the people on the other side of the door, the guy who looks like he needs to be somewhere fast, the teachers who carry countless boxes and files everywhere. At work I do it for the customers. There's nothing like investing a little good into the day. I enjoy my job.

What I don't, however, enjoy, is when I do this sort of thing and people don't say thank you. Sometimes, people don't even acknowledge my presence. I'm not a ghost! I'm not a doorstop! I have just given a little time and energy to make you feel better. Please thank me for it. If at this point any readers are saying or thinking, "yeah, but you only do it for yourself", of course I do. That's what we all do. That's the only reason people do good things- to make themselves feel good, or better, about who they are. To relieve guilt. I was an AWFUL child, and I mean that, truly I do. I was terrible. Nowadays I try to be as friendly and docile as possible. I use manners. I say thank you. I say please. Not in that order.

I don't understand two things in this situation: one, why don't people say thank you for these little gestures? And two, why is this now acceptable? There should be a universal level of respect for everyone. But only for the right reasons. If you're older than me, it doesn't give me any cause to respect you. I respect you because you've been here longer- it's not about age, it's about experience in the field, in life. I respect my coworkers, because I know that people don't appreciate even the most menial jobs can mean endless hours of tiring work. When did it become okay to expect other people to open the door for you? When did it become okay to completely ignore your waiter or waitress at dinner? When did it become okay to talk down to people because they know less than you or because they've done wrong things in the past? Derogatory behaviour rips us apart. Friends turn against friends. Families fail to communicate.

A few little rules we should all use:

* Obey the rules of the road, people! They're there for a reason.
* Don't interrupt people while they're talking unless it's important. Really important.
* Help where you can.
* Don't assume people have or haven't done things. If you assume someone is guilty, you may well be treating an innocent man wrongly. If you assume someone is lazy, check they're not doing their work elsewhere.
* Try to genuinely understand the situation others are in.
* Say please, say thank you.
* Appreciate people for doing their jobs!
* Say please and thank you some more.
* Be chivalrous.
* Be helpful.
* Jealousy is fine, just don't voice it.
* Talking about one person to another is a quick way to lose friends and/or gain a reputation as a gossip. Sharing secrets is not condoned.
* NEVER use technology while at the dinner table. It should be about the people there, and the food.
* Chew. with. your. mouth. closed.
* Don't speak with your mouth full.
* Don't laugh at others for not being able to do something just because you find it easy. They are probably better than you at something else.
* Don't lie to get others into trouble. If you mess up, you should take the blame.

Happy reading, folks!